While a few weeks have already passed, Michael Jackson’s death remains big news. Although his fame was mostly in the 70s and 80s, his passing affects generations – young and old alike. It is difficult to be indifferent about his demise because there is a little of Michael Jackson in all of us.

He was arguably the most exciting performer of his time. At the same time, he was probably the most unconventional entertainer. His dancing style was unorthodox and was known for his moonwalks and crotch-grabbing dance moves. He had a unique high-pitched singing style that was occasionally punctuated with yells, squeals, deep breaths and titters. He even dressed differently with sequined socks, single glove, military-type tops and multi-zippered jackets.

As years went by, Michael slowly transformed into a bizarre figure. His nose became narrower, his skin paler, his chin more prominent and his hair straighter than ever before. He even spoke in a breathy, juvenile voice. It appeared like he was a little boy trapped in a grown man’s body. He had a chimpanzee for a best friend and constantly surrounded himself with children. He lived in Neverland, a fantasy playground filled with toys, rides and animals. Because of his outrageous ways and lifestyle, he was often referred to as “Wacko Jacko.”

It seemed that he was forever trying to challenge the norms of society. His very essence was all about waging war against stereotypes. And this is where I feel a certain connection with Michael. In my own way, I may be a wacko too because I also try to defy gravity. I own and run a company that operates in a male-dominated market and I secretly post sexy photos in the net for kicks.

Love him or hate him, there is no escaping Michael Jackson even in death. Whether we like it or not, we are affected by his death because we somehow see part of ourselves in him. To me, his death is tragic. It means that there is one less wacko in this world today.

I got a lot of feedback through emails and YM after I wrote about my thoughts regarding the video scandal issue. People were basically asking me the same questions so I figured that I will answer all that in this entry.

Aside from my FHM photos, do I keep explicit pics?
Yes.

Do I have sex videos of my own?
Yes.

Do I delete all explicit photos and sex videos after they are taken?
No.

What if they end up being circulated to the public and my identity is revealed?
First of all, I would like to thank all those who expressed concern in the event that this happens to me. Your words were greatly appreciated.

But the truth is, I am nothing compared to Hayden Kho and Katrina Halili. They are celebrities. I am just a regular person. If my private porn falls in the wrong hands, it’s not going to be big news. But, I am fully aware of the controversies that may arise within my own personal circles.

Of course, being discovered is something to worry about. That is why I go through great lengths to protect myself. Should bad luck come my way though, then I guess I will just have to suck it all up and face the consequences. If I had the guts to do all those kinky stuff, I should also have the guts to accept all possible repercussions.

Will I still keep on taking explicit photos and videos of myself despite all the bad sex video publicity and the negative outcome that may come my way? Why?
Yes. And, as always, they will be done discreetly and responsibly. I have said this before and I will say it again: We only live once. I want to enjoy life to the fullest. At this point, I know I have achieved a lot of successes. If my naughty side gets exposed, I am confident that I will not be judged by my explicit pics and sex videos but by my career and life accomplishments. My achievements will far outweigh the crazy things that I do on the side. I am convinced people will just say, “Hey, that’s one cool chick. She’s one savvy professional who knows how to have fun.” Besides, let’s just all look at ourselves now. Don’t we all do some crazy things in our lives?